Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Yucky Place

Don't read too much into this. But I gotta write it all the same.

I have been in a yucky place. And I am tired. Tired of feeling this way. I have the world's most patient and understanding husband. I have two wonderfully independent and challenging and adorable boys. I have a great job. I have a great house. I have great family and friends who love me even though I am a little crazy and hard to love sometimes.

But none of this seems like enough.

Yucky place.

So, I am digging out. I am no longer comfortable in my lack of contentment. I am going to write more. That used to make me really happy...writing about my family or even just writing about some birds I saw on a fence while waiting at the CVS drive-thru. It made me happy. I am going to spend less time worrying about why I don't feel content because the very act of worrying about a lack of contentment appears to be poisonous in the quest for happiness.

Not sure how this is sounding. Haven't gone back and re-read and edited and wondered if I should say something a partciular way. I'm just typing. And I am about to hit publish.

Just wanted anyone who might still stumble upon this slice of the internet landscape in hopes of finding a recent post to know that I am trying to get back to the "me" that found even the tiniest bit of solice in writing. In sharing. In connecting. It's been too long.

No more yucky place.

4 comments:

Sincerely Anna said...

Hey, I'm still here stumbling :) I think connecting is key. God will put your feet back on solid ground and that, for you, I believe, is when you are writing/contemplating/expressing. Like me. I recommend Beth Moore's Get Out of That Pit. An easy read and very encouraging when you just feel like you are going through the motions of life and not visualizing the future in the same way you once did.

Roses Are Red, Violets are Violet said...

Thank you Anna. Your friendship is one I have missed while mired in the Yucky Place.So good to hear from you.I will check it out.

heatherg said...

I am in a yucky place too. Maybe we can dig out together.

Megan (FriedOkra) said...

yep, I know that yucky place. It is somewhat heartening to know others are there, too, even though I wouldn't wish it on anyone, especially not anyone I like! But I know the yucky place and I'd like out, too. :) I'm looking forward to hearing from you more often.