Tuesday, May 27, 2014

DING DONG...Serenity Interrupted

When we last heard from Katie "Look How Serene My Morning Is" Bodiford, she was half-dressed in the kitchen listening to The Eagles, lighting her fresh grass candle and contemplating her boys' first day of a lazy summer. The house, in a state of flux due to her impending move, was the last thing she intended to worry about on this day. She had the rest of the week to worry about such things. That is until.....

DING DONG.

It's 8:30? Who could that be? Her eldest son was still asleep in bed and her half-dressed 6-year old was in the play room upstairs watching TV. Now... how could she sprint across the open hallway to her bedroom where she could become FULLY dressed without the person at the door seeing her? She peered ever so slightly around the corner to see the person's back turned. Then, darting across the foyer like a solider evading enemy gunfire she raced into her room to throw some clothes on.

DINGGGGGG DONGGGGGG.

Katie ran to the door (trying to not appear to be as out of breath as she actually was) to find a guy standing there and a car  waiting down at the street containing his wife and kids.

"Um. Hi. Mrs. Bodiford?" he asked almost hesitantly.  "Um, I'm the owner of your house and we're in town from Tennessee. Did the real estate agent tell you we were coming by to do an inspection of the house?"

I'll stop right there. Anyone who has known me since about 5 minutes ago knows that I WENT INTO FULL PANIC MODE. FLIP-PING OUT. Yes, I normally try to keep a house somewhat devoid of pig sty characteristics but this was different. An INSPECTION? My mind immediately fast forwarded to this family donning white hazmat suits and taking black lights and white gloves and... and.... well, you see where I'm going with this. Did I mention that I was flipping out?

"Well, um, NO he sure didn't," I replied in my most gracious, genteel Southern lady voice while on the inside I was screaming ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? DO YOU KNOW WHAT A MESS MY HOUSE IS? I told him my son was still asleep and I had pulled items out all over the house for a yard sale and asked if I could have a little time to "tidy up." He agreed to come back in a couple hours. I thanked them and shut the door.

What happened next is a flurry of such cataclysmic proportions that I can't exactly recall what happened. What I do know is my poor twelve-year old was awakened with a frantic "they're coming back soon and this house has to be ready and has your bathroom been cleaned since we moved in and get up, get up, getttt upppp!" He rolled out of the bed like a new army recruit, jumped to his feet and began making up his side of the bed. (gotta love the kid's ability to act in a pressure situation :) Jacob took the furniture polish and began spraying smiley faces on the furniture then wiping it clean. Who am I to stifle his artistic cleaning abilities?

I'll spare you the details but I am proud to say (and almost too exhausted to type) that when they pulled up the house was spotless and the owners said they couldn't ask for someone to take better care of their home.

EXHALE.

There are only a couple weeks left until we close on the new house and can finally "settle in" to a home where surprise inspections aren't on the agenda. But this Momma and her boys worked a miracle today. We all chipped in and got this house in ship shape without the whining and fussing I expected. Not even a single sword fight using broom handles and dust pans for shields. I'm pretty proud of my fellas.

Can I take a nap now???

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